So why the 10-Mistakes-You-Cannot-Make-When-Confronted-with-Violence? Let's be clear about a couple of things, shall we? Self-Defense is not TaeBo, Cardio Kickboxing or Martial Arts Fitness classes or any of the myriad classes being offered to women in the guise of self defense.
Self Defense is about the real world and real world consequences where something goes horribly wrong. The 10-Mistakes-You-Cannot-Make-When-Confronted-with-Violence is about recognizing potentially violent & dangerous situations; knowing how to employ verbal de-escalation and boundary skills; having a game plan to deal with a threat; and having the physical and psychological skills to deal with violence and its aftermath.
We would like to share with you the 10 most common mistakes women make when confronted with violence.
Hope - hope it will go away. The reality is it will not go away until you take the necessary actions to end the situation.
Compassion - Do not put your moral values on your attacker. If he had any compassion, he would not be putting you in the situation you are currently in.
Fairness - It does not exist in violence. If you are expecting there to be rules, here's one, there are none. Expect to be attacked at your most vulnerable and when the attacker feels most in power.
Social Conditions - Do not put your social restraints to the attack. The two are completely incompatible.
Equal - Do not believe you can compete equally with your attacker's level of violence. You aren't programmed that way.
Anger - Do not let your anger lead you into a confrontational or challenging situation. You need to keep a clear head.
Submission - Do not give up, ever, if attacked.
We're Safe - Do not continue to lie to yourself or your loved ones. The realities of today are what they are and living in a fairy world will not make them go away. Prepare yourself and your family.
Self Doubt - Remember, you did not start anything or ask for any trouble. You are justified in defending yourself.
Giving Up - see number 7 - do not ever give up, ever, if attacked.
You know and I know that only "we" can be responsible for our own personal safety. To believe anything else is just setting ourselves up for failure and a lot of pain, both physical and emotional. Use the 10-Mistakes-You-Cannot-Make-When-Confronted-with-Violence in your daily routines until they become habits. Keep yourself safe!
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To be safe, we each need to ensure our own safety by taking valid, empowering women's self defense classes.
Angie M. Tarighi is the CEO & Founder of Women's Self-Defense Institute and has been teaching women's self-defense programs for over 20 years. She is a tireless advocate of self-reliance and responsibility, encouraging women to actively protect life through awareness and education.
Angie holds the following certifications: